August 17, 2015

Continuing the board member performance expectations from Cohort 24… Ah those days at SMU.

Make sure to review the first 7 of these performance expectations in my August 3 blog.

8. Fill one table at the annual gala and assume that you’re off the hook for at least a quarter of the year.

9. Refuse to volunteer for any extra positions.

10. Assume that the executive committee has made the important decisions, and thus your attention is not really necessary.

11. Have a lot of opinions about what is wrong, but no solutions.

12. If you’re presenting, leave the moment you’ve finished.

13. Decides what font should be in the gala invitation. Bonus points if you make the volunteer who designed the invitation cry.

14. Talk to our donors about funding your other interests – especially if you can steal a major  donor for our competitors.

15. Recruit new board members based on your political goals.

16. Hire your alcoholic roommate to do fundraising for the organization. Let him keep 15% of what he makes for you.

17. Do not offer any assistance to new board members. They’re after you. Fight them. Violently. Especially any innovative or new ideas. Assume they are undermining your power.

About Simone Joyaux

A consultant specializing in fund development, strategic planning, and board development, Simone P. Joyaux works with all types and sizes of nonprofits, speaks at conferences worldwide, and teaches in the graduate program for philanthropy at Saint Mary’s University, MN. Her books, Keep Your Donors and Strategic Fund Development, are standards in the field.

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