Simone Uncensored

February 10, 2020

Anger. Sadness.

I’m in a strange place right now. Politics. My country. Justice. Competence and excellence for my beloved nonprofit sector. Whatever…

ANGER. And, of course, how about anger management.

Lots of statements – often directed at women – “curb your anger…”

But then I read “Why Tinkerbell Quit Anger Management.” A poem in a book called Fierce Fairytales, by Nikita Gill. Why did Tinkerbell quit anger management? “Because whole kingdoms have already spent millennia trying to keep women subdued, only to be discarded in old age.”

I searched “telling women to top being angry” on the Internet. Tons & tons & tons of articles…. Here are a few of my favorite titles:

And as long as I’m on the subject of anger. How about we acknowledge and honor the anger of people of color, too? I’ve said it before…Read Ta Nehisi Coates books. See his marvelous articles in The Atlantic. Find so many other righteous books and articles. Read Peggy McIntosh’s Invisible Knapsack of sooooo many years ago.

Not enough progress. Too damn little change.

And even in our own beloved philanthropic sector. We’re supposed to be better. See my own Philanthropy’s Moral Dilemma.

Am I more angry or more sad? Am I equally angry and sad?

Looking back to why Tinkerbell quit anger management…

I had to give up on their remedies. They kept trying to make me less angry, but I refuse to surrent my rage. Because who kingdoms have already spent millenia trying to keep women subdued, only to be discard in old age.

My fury gets things done, it has saved lives, it has made the world listen where I could not speak, my anger screamed.

….So no I love my tinderbox heart so easy to light up, all it takes is half a spark

I am small and I am angry, it is how I channel my energy and I like me that way.

Thank you Nikita Gill.

I am angry and will continue to channel my anger and speak it and share it.

I am deeply deeply sad. And still see to manage it.

February 10, 2020

Part 1. Part 2. Pretty darn sad.

February 2, I woke up to this. From Tom Ahern’s blog. I agree. Makes me hugely sad and angry.

Are most charities unwittingly in the “go-away” business?You have to wonder.

         I don’t really expect all that much from any charity I support. I’m not looking for rides to the airport or artisanal cheese plates. As our household’s income grew over the decades, Simone and I made donations to more and more good causes. Hey, we didn’t have kids (which fully explains that second home in France). We also had a reassuring retirement fund socked away (so we wouldn’t end up homeless, as a friend or two had finished up). And so — yeah, sure; why not — we could afford occasional gifts to charities that made us feel better because they were fighting the very things we wanted to fight.

So now we give to 30 or so charities a year.

I quickly saw that most nonprofits were lousy at prolonging my pleasure, though.

“Here’s all I want from you,” I finally wrote in a book. “Tell me I’m a reasonably good person. Don’t go crazy. But just tell me that my help matters.” Even so: most of “our” charities remain hesitant, self-absorbed, indifferent, narcissistic, negligent, uncouth, dumb, rude, demanding, stiff, formal, and/or cold.

Poor lovers get replaced quickly. Just saying.

Examine your own dating past if this surprises you.

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The very next thing I read is Seth Godin’s blog Again and again and again

Ruts don’t dig themselves.

Most of the time, we’re in a rut because that’s precisely where we put ourselves.

Actions become habits, and habits get repeated because they feel safe.

The easiest way to make things more interesting is to simply stop repeating your habitual behavior.

And that often comes from reacting to triggers. Remove the triggers and you can alter the habits.

Tiny changes. Different ways to keep score.

Tomorrow comes daily. But we don’t have to take the same route to get there.

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It’s as if Tom and Seth were sharing one brain while writing.

I want to yell and scream and rant and rave. I want to weep with deep sadness.

Oh… I already do so regularly… In the privacy of my office. With my clients. While presenting.

Tom and Seth just said it better. Thank you.

February 3, 2020

Wandering around this thought

“It’s a strange feeling to miss someone you never met.” A comment made in a YouTube video of Freddie Mercury / Queen performance. …

Think about that beautiful statement…to miss someone you never met. I think that’s different than admiring someone you never met. To wish you’d met someone that you hadn’t – and never would – meet.

I’ve been thinking lots about like and love… due to the Philanthropic Psychology Certificate Program that I’m taking from Jen Shang and the Instititute for Sustainable Philanthropy. Just imagine what you could learn… the psychology of liking and loving… and how we can use that for fundraising.

So many people I admire over the course of my life. Admire and respect and wish I’d spoken with, learned from, worked with…

But how is “missing someone” different? What does it mean to miss someone? Why do we miss someone?

But right now…I’m just going back to that strange feeling to miss someone you never met. Damn these emotions. Emotions. Feelings.

Any connection to anything any of us do?

January 27, 2020

Learning together

Visit my presenting schedule on this website.

I’m off to Michigan…. East Lansing where I grew up! MSU where I went to school. My partner, Tom Ahern joins me.

Thursday, March 12, 2020. Kellogg Center, MSU. AFP Chapter. Register here.

I hope you’ll join us!!

 

January 27, 2020

Just thoughts wandering

Listening to music. Picking and choosing. Scrolling and re-discovering…

How I loved Newsroom with Jeff Daniels. Check out this youtube video – getting to Memphis.

Do you know this beautiful song? Same Love, Macklemore & Ryan Lewis.

The Weary Kind . Sung by Ryan Bingham. From that wonderful movie with Jeff Bridges.

If only we would choose to rise up… Through troubles and pain. When I first heard it…this was for justice… hope for justice…all the fights…

This Time… Jonathan Rhys Meyers

Surely pretty much “everyone” knows American Pie. But have you seen the marvelous lipdub from Grand Rapids, Michigan. Ah Michigan…where I grew up.

And of course, Leonard and everyone’s versions of Hallelujah. And k.d. Lang’s version at the Olympics.

Sometimes just listening to music helps…right?

 

 

Filed under: Just for fun

January 13, 2020

“Notes of the Notables”

Really great Wall Street Journal article … October 26-27, 2019 … “Notes of the Notables,” by Erika Berlin and Matthew Kitchen.

So who are the notables? Johnny Cash. Thelonious Monk. Nora Ephron. Charles Dickens. Grace Jones. Charles Darwin. Marilyn Monroe. James Naismith. Benjamin Branklin. George Lucas.

Nora Ephron wrote a list about what she’d miss after she died. That’s pretty damn cool, I think. Check the article to find out what she’d miss the most.

What was George Lucas’ list about? Alternative titles for his film “American Graffiti.” Wow are some of them ever really weird!!!!

Thelonious Monk wrote 25 handwritten tips for his bandmates. “You’ve got to dig it to dig it, you dig?”

ENJOY!!

 

Filed under: Just for fun

January 7, 2020

Vacation memories…

Memories from vacation…

Well, actually, written while on vacation…to then become a memory.

Watching The West Wing. 7 seasons. Not sure that I’ll finish all 7 this vacation.

The most wonderful show. Enviable governing… Good politics…

A trip down memory lane…Loving the show. Wishing this was real. I remember talking with colleagues about what happened in an episode…only we were talking like it was real. We recognized that and then we started chuckling.

Shit…This wasn’t real!!!

 

Filed under: Just for fun

January 5, 2020

Anticipate. Pre-empt.

Hello, Everyone….

Anticipate…pre-empt

I’ve been thinking about this lots. And I realize I’ve been thinking and operating this way forever.

But it’s only now that I’ve articulated the phrase.

And I need to explain it to you all … one of these days.

Simone

 

Filed under: Leadership

December 22, 2019

More just for fun

Movies or books or music and…

Billy Elliott (the movie) and Billy Elliott (the musical)

Strictly Ballroom (So much fun…Culture clash…Ballroom dancing…Some comic comedy…)

American President … Always one of my favorites

Silverado…The Big Chill…Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid…

Rocketman…Bohemian Rhapsody…

= = = = = = = = = = =

Movies or books or music and…

How I love science fiction fantasy…Guy Gavriel Kay… Jennifer Roberson…

And, of course, the great sci fi masters like Game of Thrones and Anne McCaffrey and…

= = = = = = = = = = = =

Movies or books or music and…

Classic rock and jazz and folk and movie music and classical…

Dire Straits. Beatles. Pink Floyd.. Rolling Stones… I want to visit the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame again!!!!!

Django Reinhardt. Edith Piaf. Sydney Bechet. Muddy Waters. John Coltrane. Louis Armstrong, Ella, and…

Tchaikowsky. Beethoven. Copland. And so many more…….

 

Filed under: Just for fun

December 19, 2019

Movies. TV. And vacation time.

The growing collection of DVDs for vacation joy…… So many delightful ones!

NewsRoom

Another Aaron  Sorkin script. Oh my gosh!! WOW! [My mom used to say, “wowdy dow.”]

And how about The American President?

And there’s so much more Aaron Sorkin.

Oh my. Oh wonderful.

Fun. Funny. Truthful. Angry. I’m so sad and angry. I know it’s “just a TV show” or “just a movie” … Because so much of this is real or at least feels real.

 

 

 

Filed under: Just for fun

Simone Joyaux, ACFRE, Adv Dip, FAFP, is an internationally recognized expert in fund development, board and organizational development, strategic planning, and management.

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